tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16201378.post113154813665647861..comments2023-12-28T18:17:11.191-05:00Comments on Gruntled Center: The “Adults First” Divorce Culture Lives OnGruntledhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14377809238377382438noreply@blogger.comBlogger8125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16201378.post-1131630485050674902005-11-10T08:48:00.000-05:002005-11-10T08:48:00.000-05:00Judith Wallerstein remarks that it is just amazing...Judith Wallerstein remarks that it is just amazing, in retrospect, that the '70s family law reforms were made with almost no thought about the effects on children.Gruntledhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14377809238377382438noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16201378.post-1131621316859105092005-11-10T06:15:00.000-05:002005-11-10T06:15:00.000-05:00As long as someone has mentioned pro-life/pro-choi...As long as someone has mentioned pro-life/pro-choice, would it amaze you that both Roe v Wade (Jan 22, 1973) and approval of the final version of the Uniform Marriage and Divorce Act (Aug 2, 1973) took place?<BR/><BR/>They use the same tactics to 'sell' both, and it is all 'me' oriented. <BR/><BR/>See http://www.stolenvows.com/ and her sister site http://www.divorceresourcecenter.com/<BR/><BR/>Judy is also a former Court Mediator from Wisconsin. That is where she had HER eyes opened about no fault unilateral forced divorce. I had mine opened when I watched my in law divorce in 75 and saw the effects on their four children, ages approx 25 to 11. They ALSO fit Elizabeth's observations, though three were 17 or older. I had my eyes widely opened ten years later when I became a forced participant in the system with no defense. <BR/><BR/>Elizabeth is my children's voice. God bless her. It is time my generation begins to listen to both the survivors of Roe and Uniform Marriage and Divorce Act.... they can teach us a few things that we need to hear!WI Catholichttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12325420326584754119noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16201378.post-1131598794097733242005-11-09T23:59:00.000-05:002005-11-09T23:59:00.000-05:00Thanks for bringing "The Squid and the Whale" to o...Thanks for bringing "The Squid and the Whale" to our attention. Television does a pretty bad job on the downside of divorce for kids, but I hadn't thought of movies as a potentially richer source.Gruntledhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14377809238377382438noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16201378.post-1131597399559787492005-11-09T23:36:00.000-05:002005-11-09T23:36:00.000-05:00Several recent movies (including recently released...Several recent movies (including recently released Noah Baumbach's independent film, see <A HREF="http://coloradodivorcepoint.blogspot.com/2005/10/squid-and-whale-divorce-at-cinema_28.html" REL="nofollow">The Squid and the Whale: Divorce at the Cinema</A>, ) do a much better job reporting on the impact of divorce on children than most of these "journalism-lite" pieces.<BR/><BR/>As a full-time divorce mediator, I am often amazed at adult parents discussing parenting time solely in terms of their personal schedules, preferences, and concerns — with precious little focus on their children's needs.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16201378.post-1131555715983941982005-11-09T12:01:00.000-05:002005-11-09T12:01:00.000-05:00I am glad that Elizabeth Marquardt and the book ar...I am glad that Elizabeth Marquardt and the book are getting all this attention. My wife says that for children of divorce this book has something of the effect of The Feminine Mystique in giving a handle on "the problem that has no name."Gruntledhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14377809238377382438noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16201378.post-1131555564734094082005-11-09T11:59:00.000-05:002005-11-09T11:59:00.000-05:00I saw Marquardt on Anderson Cooper last night--she...I saw Marquardt on Anderson Cooper last night--she seemed very astute, and basically told off another researcher that was a big fan of the 'good' divorce for the same reasons you mentioned above. Fascinating research, and from my own experiences, she's right.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16201378.post-1131550893311348052005-11-09T10:41:00.000-05:002005-11-09T10:41:00.000-05:00Well, my first reaction is that divorce is sort of...Well, my first reaction is that divorce is sort of sideways to abortion. I think much of pro-life thinking is as concerned with how it affects adults as it is with children. My guess is that adults for whom divorce is an option believe the "divorce happy talk" that kids resiliently adjust, because they want to believe it. If we put the enduring scars of divorce for kids front and center in the divorce debate, that consciousness would change. With abortion, by contrast, the suffering of the aborted is already front and center; the issue is whether they are kids or not.Gruntledhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14377809238377382438noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16201378.post-1131550052780206832005-11-09T10:27:00.000-05:002005-11-09T10:27:00.000-05:00Would you say this style of reporting mirrors the ...Would you say this style of reporting mirrors the fundamental conflict between the "pro-life" and "pro-choice" crowds? The latter viewing the issue as one of how it impacts the mother and the former regarding it as an issue that also affects someone else?Anonymousnoreply@blogger.com