tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16201378.post114613807160173369..comments2023-12-28T18:17:11.191-05:00Comments on Gruntled Center: College Drinking: from Academic Pressure, or Family Functioning?Gruntledhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14377809238377382438noreply@blogger.comBlogger4125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16201378.post-1146238020397853322006-04-28T11:27:00.000-04:002006-04-28T11:27:00.000-04:00This is the author of the journal entry. Thanks to...This is the author of the journal entry. Thanks to Mr. Lammers and Mr. McIntyre for sharing their collegiate experiences. What you've said about alcohol as a method of male bonding is valuable to my understanding. However, our class is about mate selection, gender relations, and family nuances, so that's the phenomenon that currently interests me. After reading David Buss' "The Evolution of Desire," I was surprised at how mate selection, often subconsciously, underscores nearly every activity that human beings pursue. It's part of our basic biology.<BR/><BR/>When I talked about "suspending the rules," I wasn't necessarily referring to the unspoken code of fraternity brothers. Rather, members of Level Three families are defined by the obligations of their roles in the family. "A good husband spends his free time with his wife and children," even if he would like to occasionally spend the weekend fishing with his buddies. "A good daughter calls home every week," even if she doesn't really want to talk to her mother. Because their interactions are so guided by "should" and "ought," it's difficult to establish intimacy between family members. Carry that into college interactions - if most students didn't learn intimacy skills in their families, it stands to reason that they could have a hard time finding way to connect within friendships, brotherhoods/sisterhoods, and romantic relationships. Then we might start to think of alcohol as the crutch that breaks down the initial barrier to intimacy without undermining all the values of the family. <BR/><BR/>You're right, it's often impossible to pinpoint the motives that underlie behavior, because people so rarely know WHY they do what they do. I certainly don't think that I've come to the conclusive answer on why college students drink too much and then "hook up," and I don't believe that one single explanation that will ever adequately cover all the facets.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16201378.post-1146230350021200062006-04-28T09:19:00.000-04:002006-04-28T09:19:00.000-04:00If Prufrock had consumed a pitcher of margaritas, ...If Prufrock had consumed a pitcher of margaritas, perhaps he would have dared to eat a peach.<BR/><BR/>I actually agree with Mr. Lammers. From my admittedly narrow experience, undergraduate drinking is as often a way of fitting in with other guys as it is a way of meeting women.<BR/><BR/>When I was an undergraduate, males outnumbered females two-to-one at my institution and there was not a great deal of romantic interaction between the sexes. (The school had only gone coed twenty years before my matriculation.) Still, I think that alcohol consumption was the primary extra-curricular activity of a high percentage of the student body.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16201378.post-1146186960848060242006-04-27T21:16:00.000-04:002006-04-27T21:16:00.000-04:00"...college women say it’s easier to sleep with a ..."...college women say it’s easier to sleep with a guy than have a genuine conversation with him." Maybe I just need to shut my mouth!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16201378.post-1146175244589626022006-04-27T18:00:00.000-04:002006-04-27T18:00:00.000-04:00While I'm always a little amused when theories abo...While I'm always a little amused when theories about why people drink ignore the fact that people feel good when they drink, I think you're right that it is a social lubricant. However, I must disagree, at least partially with Miss Anderson's thought that it is always about the opposite sex. I would argue that (at least for males) it is as much, or more, a matter of bonding in an acceptable manner between same sex individuals as Brothers, friends and comrades. <BR/><BR/>BTW: If you think that drinking is heavy at Centre you should spend some time with military folks. I remember getting out of the military, enrolling at Centre, and laughing at all the light-weights when I went down to the fraternity houses.<BR/><BR/>Anyway, I must say that I disagree with your "supension of the rules" hypothesis. The rules change - they are not suspended - and violations can lead to immediate or long term social consequences. I know it's impractical because observation changes interaction, but I think you'd find it interesting to go to a fraternity house and observe for a period of time. There is definitely a set of rules in place (and I don't mean those imposed by the college). The rules will vary from house to house and may be hard to define but they are present. There are social punishments for consistent over drinking - in my house this usually meant that you got pictures drawn on your face in permanent black marker when you fell asleep. People will be obligated to help someone who overindulged this one time. There's also going to be a set of rules about which guy can go after which girl (or vice-versa) for various reasons involving her standing in that house - no matter how drunk a Brother is another Brother's girlfriend is off limits and so is the girl everybody in the house hates. These are just a few examples. I'm sure your students who are currently experiencing this would be better at describing these rules than I am using 10 year old memories.Ken Lammershttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15646250142814585354noreply@blogger.com