tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16201378.post113071782421760910..comments2023-12-28T18:17:11.191-05:00Comments on Gruntled Center: The eHarmony Guy Delivers Some of the GoodsGruntledhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14377809238377382438noreply@blogger.comBlogger7125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16201378.post-1130991129578616582005-11-02T23:12:00.000-05:002005-11-02T23:12:00.000-05:00This is the rare case where new technology can hel...This is the rare case where new technology can help change a social norm. In a generation, it could be an accepted norm that all children have identified fathers and mothers.Gruntledhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14377809238377382438noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16201378.post-1130989824951850832005-11-02T22:50:00.000-05:002005-11-02T22:50:00.000-05:00Men named as fathers do not have to agree, and can...Men named as fathers do not have to agree, and can ask for DNA testing. The State initially pays for the test, which the father has to pay for if the test does not exclude him as the father. This year I have had two cases where the DNA testing excluded the named father. If he signs the birth certificate as the father, that is considered an admission, and paternity is determined. Most of the DNA testing is rendered in child support cases. You are right about the bi-partisan support for going after "dead-beat Dads." Congress has declared that any state which fails to take affirmative and aggressive action in suing to collect child support is in jeopardy of losing all federal funding administered through state departments of health and human services. Tax intercepts, mandatory wage witholding of up to 66% of a man's disposable income, mandatory health insurance implementation, and serious penalties for employers which do not comply are mandated by the federal government, to be implemented by the states, which must do so, or risk losing federal funding.Chuckhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03919820205142822787noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16201378.post-1130863136678980862005-11-01T11:38:00.000-05:002005-11-01T11:38:00.000-05:00This sounds like such a sensible book - much more ...This sounds like such a sensible book - much more so than so much of the crap like "The Rules" which infests the relationships section of bookstores. I should try to get my hands on this - the fact that it's written by a psychologist with years of experience counseling couples is a HUGE plus.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16201378.post-1130804465376531492005-10-31T19:21:00.000-05:002005-10-31T19:21:00.000-05:00Do fathers have to agree when they are named by th...Do fathers have to agree when they are named by the mothers? I think the political will to identify fathers and penalize the non-compliant mothers could be mustered. There seems to be bipartisan support for going after deadbeat dads, which seems to me to be a parallel problem.Gruntledhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14377809238377382438noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16201378.post-1130793707689871462005-10-31T16:21:00.000-05:002005-10-31T16:21:00.000-05:00One problem with requiring determination of patern...One problem with requiring determination of paternity (maternity is always determined at birth)is a political decision would have to be made to pass a law that there would have to sanctions imposed on the mother for failing to identify the father at birth, with exceptions, such as in rape cases, or it will not work. I actually have had cases, this year where the mother either (a) did not know who the father was even in the context of consensual sexual relations - two men came forward, and DNA testing was ordered, and (b) the mother intentionally misled child support authorities. These are generally rare, and perhaps, with sanctions (and a willingness to enact and enforce them), the second situation would be less likely to occur.Chuckhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03919820205142822787noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16201378.post-1130728765965803682005-10-30T22:19:00.000-05:002005-10-30T22:19:00.000-05:00So what would be a good policy that might help wit...So what would be a good policy that might help with this situation? It seems to me a good thing to establish legal paternity (and maternity) for every child. Would that work?Gruntledhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14377809238377382438noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16201378.post-1130725632633840602005-10-30T21:27:00.000-05:002005-10-30T21:27:00.000-05:00We must do something for the children. As a family...We must do something for the children. As a family lawyer, last year over half of my domestic law cases involved unmarried parents in parenting or support issues. Of my paternity cases, about 75% were initiated by the Bureau for Child Support Enforcement (BCSE), and of the ones initiated by the BCSE, in about 20% of the cases, the mother did not start the proceeding, but was a necessary party to the government action because she had received TANF (temporary aid to needy families) benefits. The other 25% of my paternity cases were initiated by the father who wanted a legal relationship with his child, and was concerned, after they ceased living together, that the mother would want nothing to do with him, or would move out of state, leaving him without legal recourse to visitation or parental decision making.Chuckhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03919820205142822787noreply@blogger.com